In the past, divorce almost always ended with two parents in separate homes with children moving between the houses. While this is still a common route, some parents consider birdnesting a more positive alternative.
According to BBC, birdnesting allows your children to adjust to divorce by remaining in the family home shortly after the breakup.
Is birdnesting for everyone?
Nesting is not a parenting style for everyone. If you do not have a good relationship with your ex, you may have more complications with nesting. After the divorce, your children stay in the family home. You and your former spouse may rent a separate home or apartment to stay in when one parent has visitation. If you do not have an amicable relationship with your ex, you may have more difficulties sharing the same home or apartment.
For others, birdnesting helps with the transition. You have time to make major financial decisions and to think about what your future looks like. Most people focus on the benefits of the children rather than the logistical challenges adults face. If you feel as though you cannot move forward, birdnesting may not be an ideal choice.
Is birdnesting permanent?
When your children remain in the family home, they keep their routine and adjust to you and your former spouse being apart. They stay close to their friends and stay in the same school. However, if you nest for too long, your children may become confused by your relationship dynamic. They may cling to the idea that you and your ex want to work things out.
When it comes to birdnesting, it is only ideal for a few months. Eventually, both parents should have separate homes.