On Behalf of Palacios Law Group |
It is normal for your kids to feel overwhelmed, confused or upset during a divorce. As your family dynamic changes, they have a lot to adjust to. How you and your ex behave can influence their feelings about the divorce.
In a high-conflict divorce, kids may see their family as a failure or worry about which side to take. To avoid excessive negative feelings about the divorce, you and your ex must create a positive experience.
Work together as parents for your children
To create a positive family post-divorce, you and your spouse must agree to make it that way. Do not speak badly of one another. Make sure your children understand the divorce has nothing to do with your feelings towards them and that you and your ex will continue to care for them, regardless of your marital status. Put aside your negative feelings towards your spouse to encourage a positive relationship between the kids and parents.
Focus on what stays the same
Kids need to feel stable. Divorce can shift their world upside down and you need to help stabilize it again. Your conversations should not revolve around what changes but what remains the same. There are times when talk of change is important but do not make it the social point of every conversation. Instead, discuss aspects of the routine that will stay the same. Let them know that the family dynamics between them and others will not change.
If you can model a healthy breakup, your kids will feel more comfortable with the divorce and practice healthy habits in future relationships.
